So if you live anywhere on the right hand side of America, you probably got killed by storms yesterday and/or today. The last big Halloween storm was Sandy, but they don’t give names to wicked thunderstorms that blow all the leaves off your trees prematurely in the summer. If they did, the names would all be things like: “Jerk” or “I Forgot to Cover the Grill, Dammit.”
So from now til Halloween, I am going to be worried that, thanks to this storm, I won’t have the right amount of dead rustley leaves in my yard come the fall. And if I don’t, I will have to come up with something else that will make things more scary.
I guess I could put a sign up to tell everyone to go into the back yard and go in the pool to get their candy. Because that’s all the pool is good for now: kid trap. Can’t go swimming in it. Thanks to the storm it is full of all the leaves in my yard. Don’t believe me? Just look!
Stupid storm. I can’t believe global warming tried to ruin Halloween already. Jerks! And no, you can’t come over for a pool party unless you bring a rake or something. I am not going to kill myself for you ingrates!