At first I was thinking of listing off a bunch of costumes that would have been great choices last Halloween but terrible now (stupid Ray Rice uniform!) but then I started to feel badly about how terrible the world is so I changed my mind and am giving you a list of my top three practical tips that will make you the hit of the party.
1. Leave one hand free. Your friend is going to get sick of holding your drink for you and if you can’t reach your money or open the door of the cab, you will be in big trouble. That’s why Freddy Krueger is always a hit. You are all set as long as you remember to put your keys in the non-knife pocket.
2. All parties are hot, so if you don’t leave yourself some sort of blow hole in your costume, you will pass out while talking up that super attractive person dressed like Super Wario. Also your face will smell and feel like a wool sock after a day of cross country skiing, so leave a way to get some air in.
3. Let’s face it, the things between your belly button and your thighs are important and you never know when you will need one or more of them. If you are dressed up like Sharknado,, you will only be able to stay in costume until you break the seal, and then you are stuck in someone’s bathroom with an armload of sheets covered with gray paint and modge podge. Leave an easy way for your filthy bits to get out. Otherwise you will just be the sweaty weirdo carrying a sheet. You know, the one people point at and say: omg you should have seen that costume earlier. It was awesome.
So at the end of the day, you can add as much creativity to your costume as you want. Just make sure you accommodate your human needs when you do. You might win first prize for being a Dalek, but that won’t get you very far if you manage to hook up with someone based on your awesomeness and the first thing they see when you de-costume is your pee bottle. Seriously. Plan on not needing a pee bottle.
Categories: 31 Halloween Activities